The Lost Art of Opening Your Ears

By Robert J. Ottaviani

The bald eagle, the bog turtle, the African elephant, the blue whales, the gorillas, the lynx, the snow leopard, the giant panda, the black rhino, the whooping crane and the rarest of all sightings … the listener. All of the these aforementioned items share a common trait. They are all on the endangered species list, the listener having just been nominated by this author for special consideration. If we don’t act fast we could lose one of our greatest resources we have been given … listening.

When I was a child growing up my parents used to take me to their friends homes to visit. Visiting was a big social event back then with the grown ups gathering for coffee, confections, and exchanging pleasantries. Before our trip got under way I was always given two choices and I quote … “you are to been seen and not heard” and “don’t open your mouth and people won’t know how stupid you are”. I know by today’s standard I could turn them in to CASA (The National Committee For Prevention Of Child Abuse) or some organization looking to champion kid’s rights. But back then that’s not exactly how it worked. Kids today have no idea how good they have it.

So given my two choices I chose to adhere to both of them. In actuality my parents were probably right on both counts. Given my lack of experience in almost all facets of life at such a young age I could have blurted something less than brilliant. Secondly and most importantly, it gave me the opportunity to learn a valued life lesson … how to listen. Something that appears so simple to do and yet so hard for many to enact nowadays.

“Everybody’s talkng at me … I don’t hear a word they’re saying … only the echoes of my mind.” Unfortunately Freddie Neil, who authored this song is not alone.

Everyone’s talking these days. Everyone has something to say. Everyone has a point to make … but who’s listening? The lost art of listening is in imminent danger. If you haven’t noticed maybe it’s because you haven’t listened. Take note of some conversations that you encounter and see if you can spot that member of the endangered species.

Let me end by saying the following … listening restores a certain dignity to the spoken word by showing restraint and a level of interest in what others are saying. Listening allows one to exploit the virtue of patience. Listening makes for a more well rounded individual. As long as we are talking we only know what we know and think … but by listening we know what others know as well as ourselves. Are you listening?

Robert J. Ottaviani (Bert) is a cusp born Aries the ram who has lived through summer of love in the late sixties and the hippie culture that bled into the seventies. He has a passion for music, gardening and all things nature … and laffy taffy. He is freakishly aware of music trivia to absurd levels. Most days you can find him playing his guitar or jotting down lyrics. He was so impacted from the moment he first heard the Beatles that he has Beatle manianized his life, been to Liverpool, England and remains convinced he is the fifth Beatle . He is married to a gentle and lovely vibe of a woman with three wonderful children. He currently lives and resides in strawberry fields forever.

By Jim Calder

This time of year is typically known as the most depressing time for many. It is cold outside, exercise is usually lower than the warmer months, it gets dark earlier, and some are still coming down from the holidays. I recently was exploring the vast library of YouTube and rediscovered what the people of Japan have known for years.
Laughter is the best medicine and one that we all need. There is nothing like a good laugh, and Japanese game shows offer tons of easy and quick laughs. I have put together some clips here for easy access for our readers.
The Japanese have also figured out that it is OK and healthy to laugh at ones self, to not take yourself so seriously.

I would like to dedicate this post to two special individuals.
The first is my father-in-law Tom, who has a great hearty laugh that can be infectious at times making you smile and join in the laughter.
The second is my brother Peter, who will be traveling to Japan this spring and hopefully will be competing in one of these insanely awesome game shows.
Enjoy

This one is truly and literally NUTS.

Japan Insane Probe Spinner
I like this one because the water is either insanely hot or burns the skin and the contestants have to jump in a bucket of ice after to cool down.

Treadmill Madness with Hurdles
This one is pretty funny because most of the contestants just all go through or destroy the hurdles.

Crazy Treadmill Japanese Game
Anytime that you involve eating, a treadmill and a pit of water at the end, it will equal comedic gold!

Pantyhose Tug of War
This is one of my favorites because of the simplicity of the game and of course the smashed faces that it creates.

This one involves some serious skill and again the burning water and ice bucket. Classic.

Quiet Library
This one is pretty awesome. I am still not sure why. Probably because they are trying so hard not to make noise. The old man at the end is great.

This one is cool because of the crazy costumes the contestants have to wear.

Others
Rope Swing










This one is just straight up weird.

Overcome Grief By Strengthening Your Heart Chakra

By Alicia Parks

It’s been nearly a decade since I broke up with my boyfriend. Well, actually it’s been more like 8 months, but it’s certainly felt like an eternity. As time continues to pass and the wounds struggle to heal I’m becoming impatient with how long it’s taking to just get over it already! Is there a cure for a broken heart – other than time?

Strengthening Heart Chakras

There are the temporary fixes: ice cream, drinks with friends, a shopping spree (be it electronics or clothes), more drinks, more ice cream, and the random cute rebound. Or, the less than classy approach: angrily cutting up the pictures, burning gift and mementos into a roaring bonfire hoping the smoke will cloud the present and blur the past.

Then today in yoga, the instructor focused on the heart chakra. We moved through a series of heart openers to create space in the heart center: space to give and receive love. By my third back bend I had lost it. I gave in and let the tears flow. I felt a sudden moment of peace for the first time in months.

The heart chakra is the center of our harmony. When this energy point is balanced we feel loved and able to give love more freely. When this energy is imbalanced we feel closed off to love. The body can actually physically begin to draw more inward to close off and protect the heart center when this energy is low. However, when this energy point is balanced the heart center will open and the sternum will lift, shoulders will draw back thus allowing the energy to flow more openly.

Chakras are seven energy points within the body from the tail bone to the crown of the head. Each point is a spinning wheel of energy and depending if the energy is low, high or balanced, the spinning wheel will either be low and small, or increasingly fast and large.

The first chakra resonates at the base of the spine and is the color red. This is the center for being grounded. The second is the center for nourishment and is housed near the genitals below the navel. Its color is orange. Next is the yellow energy wheel in the solar plexus and the center for intention. The heart center is a green color. Above that is the throat chakra which is blue in color and where we find expression. The third-eye point , insight, is purple in color or depending on text could be a light blue color. Finally, the crown chakra-believed by some to be a white or clear energy or a purple color is where enlightenment, wisdom or higher spiritual knowledge is housed.

Since chakra energy is simply about finding balance, when our heart chakra is suffering from heart-ache, loss, grief or a recent breakup, perhaps focusing on charging this energy could be an alternative to time. Though many of us seek quick fixes to pain or inconvenience, a lesson in patience could be welcomed relief.

After a series of yoga classes in which I continued to focus more on the heart center through spine-strengthening sequences like cobra, locust and floor-bow to heart openers like camel and backbends I was able to let more and more go each time. Though I still have some healing to do, I believe very much that I gained a huge edge on my path to healing my heart. We may never fully understand why some relationships work and some don’t but at least there’s another option to healing.

Heart Openers

There are several beautiful options in yoga for opening the heart center. It’s simply a matter of leading with the heart, strengthening the core and spine and releasing tension hidden in the neck and shoulders. The simplest way to open the heart is proper posture-ensuring that shoulders are drawn away from the ears and down the back while pulling the naval to the spine (engaging the core).

In a standing series, taking a slight backbend while in Tadasana (Mountain Pose) is a simple and gentle option. Backbends are an effective way to open the heart as well as bring a bounty of energy into the body (which is why heart openers are best served in the morning and not before bed).

My breakthrough heart opener was in Urdhva Dhanurasana (wheel) and my continuous challenging heart opener is Ustrasana (Camel). It’s important to ensure the body is properly warmed up before engaging in heart openers since these poses require good core and spine strength. Opening the hips first (with poses such as Eka Pada Rajakasana (Pigeon)) will allow a more gentle and deeper benefit from heart openers. Other options include Dhanurasana (Bow Pose), Setu Bandha Sarvangasana (Bridge Pose), Bitilasana (Cow Pose), Matsyasana (Fish Pose), Salambhasana (Locust Pose), Bhujangasana (Cobra Pose) and even Urdva Mukha Svanasana (Upward Facing Dog).

For a gentle sequence after waking I recommend beginning with a few Sun Salutations starting with Balasana (Child’s Pose) moving on to Cat-Cow movement and on to plank pose. From there draw back to Audo Mukha Svanasana (Downward Facing Dog). Take a few deep breaths through the nose and slowly arrive to Uttanasana (forward fold). Slowing arrive to Tadasana (Mountain Pose) and take a gentle back bend. Release to Uttanasana then back to Tadasana with a back bend and flow through this a few times. From Uttanasana step back to high plank pose again and then release all the way to the ground on the belly. Inhale into Bhujangasana (Cobra Pose). Exhale to release and then inhale into Salambhasana (Locust Pose). Exhale to release and flow through these two poses a few more times. Take time between each movement and then release back Balasana (Child’s Pose) to focus on the breath and the energy in the heart chakra. Come back to Cat-Cow movement and then come to standing on knees. Close the sequence with a long, slow flow into Ustrasana (Camel) pose. Take up to six full inhalations and exhalations before letting go and slowly find a seat with eyes closed. Absorb the energy created and released around the heart center. Acknowledge any emotions that may have come up and know that which no longer serves no longer has a hold on the heart center.

“Learn, grow, live… And then write about it!” Alicia started her path to wellness and environmental leadership at Wild Oats, following college graduation with a degree in journalism. Her passion for natural living, environment, and wellness set the foundation for a future with Aveda where she is currently a marketing manager and manages the yoga program for staff and students. She is a certified yoga instructor and received her training through Core Power. Her favorite pose is handstand, though she is still working on mastering it. Her writing is a continuous practice, much like yoga, and began when she published her first book at age 12 called, “What Mothers and Fathers Do Best.” She is a proud mother of a 6-year-old boy, Tyler, the source for her inspiration to live in the moment-be mindful-be gracious and flow. Tyler is currently publishing one book a week, his latest being the “ABC of Animals.”

Read Alicia’s other article, “Getting Back to the Yoga Mat“.

By Jim Calder

If this headline caught your attention, that is because it should. We all love secrets, whether it is the alleged affairs of a professional golfer, a secret stock tip, or career advice. It is safe to say that most of us want to advance in life. But there comes a point where we all must look in the mirror and question our ethics and our motives for success. Many are still following an outdated blueprint for success, which involves tremendous amounts of greed and stepping on and over people. This is shocking when there are other smarter and modern ways to become successful.

This Year …

This has been a big year for me, and I feel I have a lot to share:

This year, I was 31 years old,

This year, ends the decade that I started my career in publishing all the way back in 2001,

This year, I built my first website from scratch,

This year, I Co-formed a start-up company called ProLong Magazine, LLC and launched ProLong Magazine.

Note: This year I married the love of my life, but that is a whole different story for another day.

The Man or Women in the Mirror

During the last few months with the launch of our start-up I have learned some valuable principles and ethics that everyone should borrow or steal.

The first step involves taking a look in the mirror and asking yourself:
a) What kind of person are you?
b) Do you only make decisions based only on increasing your bank account?
c) What motivates you to be successful?
d) In 40 years will you regret how cut throat you are with people?

If these answers are hard to swallow or sound horribly wrong when you answer them in your head, you must realize that it is never too late to change.

So how do you start your own personal transformation? Take these simple steps.

7 Steps to Success

1) Treat everyone the way that you treat your family, your boss, your biggest clients and your best customers. Treating everyone you meet this way won’t cost you much and will absolutely give you a much rewarding and fulfilling life. And if anything else some people will actually show up for your funeral.

2) When someone talks, listen. Don’t spend that time crafting a response. Take in what they are saying and really try to listen to what the person has to say.

3) When someone you don’t know sends you an email asking for information or help with something, try taking the time to help them out. Don’t delete the email; try responding even if you can’t help the person.

4) Take a closer look at your schedule next time someone asks you to do something. Are you really as busy as you think? Maybe you could miss your favorite show one night to help a friend edit a paper for school, or get off of facebook once in a while to lend a hand to your friends or contacts when needed.

5) We are all guilty of avoiding certain things. Tell yourself that winners and leaders do not avoid things; they take on new challenges despite knowing the amount of work that will be required.

6) Stop being Phony: If you find that you are fake when dealing with coworkers, friends, family and even strangers, ask yourself why?

7) Never become out of reach from the masses. This seems to be a common trait in many successful people, the ability to allow yourself to stay within reach. Sure celebrities are often out of reach, but most of them are fake plastic people.

Heroes Walk Among Us

While I was working at a publishing house I had the opportunity to chase a lot of famous authors for interviews in our magazines. Many times it took some guess work or searching online to find their email addresses. But once that Interview Request was sent, I was shocked at how many of these authors would respond personally to me.

One author that sticks out in my head is Marketing Guru and best-selling author Seth Godin (Sethgodin.typepad.com).
Seth was more than happy to be interviewed by me via email more than once. This is a man who is asked by companies such as Google to give motivational speeches to their employees … giving me a few minutes of his time. It simply blew my mind, and left a lasting impression.

Why was Mr. Godin so generous with his time? Maybe he was just a nice guy. But maybe he was a nice guy who realized the importance of staying within reach, and the value of our word-of-mouth reputations. Thanks again Seth, I will be in touch soon to borrow a few more minutes of your time for an exclusive interview with ProLong Magazine.

Everyone Needs A Team

It has been my personal experience that many things worth doing in life cannot be achieved alone. Take this theory and apply it to building your career, your own business, a relationship, an audience, a sports team and more. No one will lend a hand or do you a favor if you are rude and short with everyone that you meet. On sites like facebook and Twitter there are millions of people just waiting to find you and create relationships that last. We can’t just spam our message out to people with no interaction.

For all of those still looking in the mirror thinking about how horrible of a human being you have been you can stop now. None of us, especially I can be perfect. But we can all start making better efforts.

Jim Calder is the brand architect and co-founder of ProLong Magazine. Jim was born with the perfect combination of cockiness and self consciousness. He has over 10 years of publishing industry experience and lives and works in Philadelphia, Pa. He currently can be found on the greatest adventure of his life as a newlywed with his wife Melissa. Jim can be contacted via email at jim@prolongmagazine.com