Overcome Grief By Strengthening Your Heart Chakra

By Alicia Parks

It’s been nearly a decade since I broke up with my boyfriend. Well, actually it’s been more like 8 months, but it’s certainly felt like an eternity. As time continues to pass and the wounds struggle to heal I’m becoming impatient with how long it’s taking to just get over it already! Is there a cure for a broken heart – other than time?

Strengthening Heart Chakras

There are the temporary fixes: ice cream, drinks with friends, a shopping spree (be it electronics or clothes), more drinks, more ice cream, and the random cute rebound. Or, the less than classy approach: angrily cutting up the pictures, burning gift and mementos into a roaring bonfire hoping the smoke will cloud the present and blur the past.

Then today in yoga, the instructor focused on the heart chakra. We moved through a series of heart openers to create space in the heart center: space to give and receive love. By my third back bend I had lost it. I gave in and let the tears flow. I felt a sudden moment of peace for the first time in months.

The heart chakra is the center of our harmony. When this energy point is balanced we feel loved and able to give love more freely. When this energy is imbalanced we feel closed off to love. The body can actually physically begin to draw more inward to close off and protect the heart center when this energy is low. However, when this energy point is balanced the heart center will open and the sternum will lift, shoulders will draw back thus allowing the energy to flow more openly.

Chakras are seven energy points within the body from the tail bone to the crown of the head. Each point is a spinning wheel of energy and depending if the energy is low, high or balanced, the spinning wheel will either be low and small, or increasingly fast and large.

The first chakra resonates at the base of the spine and is the color red. This is the center for being grounded. The second is the center for nourishment and is housed near the genitals below the navel. Its color is orange. Next is the yellow energy wheel in the solar plexus and the center for intention. The heart center is a green color. Above that is the throat chakra which is blue in color and where we find expression. The third-eye point , insight, is purple in color or depending on text could be a light blue color. Finally, the crown chakra-believed by some to be a white or clear energy or a purple color is where enlightenment, wisdom or higher spiritual knowledge is housed.

Since chakra energy is simply about finding balance, when our heart chakra is suffering from heart-ache, loss, grief or a recent breakup, perhaps focusing on charging this energy could be an alternative to time. Though many of us seek quick fixes to pain or inconvenience, a lesson in patience could be welcomed relief.

After a series of yoga classes in which I continued to focus more on the heart center through spine-strengthening sequences like cobra, locust and floor-bow to heart openers like camel and backbends I was able to let more and more go each time. Though I still have some healing to do, I believe very much that I gained a huge edge on my path to healing my heart. We may never fully understand why some relationships work and some don’t but at least there’s another option to healing.

Heart Openers

There are several beautiful options in yoga for opening the heart center. It’s simply a matter of leading with the heart, strengthening the core and spine and releasing tension hidden in the neck and shoulders. The simplest way to open the heart is proper posture-ensuring that shoulders are drawn away from the ears and down the back while pulling the naval to the spine (engaging the core).

In a standing series, taking a slight backbend while in Tadasana (Mountain Pose) is a simple and gentle option. Backbends are an effective way to open the heart as well as bring a bounty of energy into the body (which is why heart openers are best served in the morning and not before bed).

My breakthrough heart opener was in Urdhva Dhanurasana (wheel) and my continuous challenging heart opener is Ustrasana (Camel). It’s important to ensure the body is properly warmed up before engaging in heart openers since these poses require good core and spine strength. Opening the hips first (with poses such as Eka Pada Rajakasana (Pigeon)) will allow a more gentle and deeper benefit from heart openers. Other options include Dhanurasana (Bow Pose), Setu Bandha Sarvangasana (Bridge Pose), Bitilasana (Cow Pose), Matsyasana (Fish Pose), Salambhasana (Locust Pose), Bhujangasana (Cobra Pose) and even Urdva Mukha Svanasana (Upward Facing Dog).

For a gentle sequence after waking I recommend beginning with a few Sun Salutations starting with Balasana (Child’s Pose) moving on to Cat-Cow movement and on to plank pose. From there draw back to Audo Mukha Svanasana (Downward Facing Dog). Take a few deep breaths through the nose and slowly arrive to Uttanasana (forward fold). Slowing arrive to Tadasana (Mountain Pose) and take a gentle back bend. Release to Uttanasana then back to Tadasana with a back bend and flow through this a few times. From Uttanasana step back to high plank pose again and then release all the way to the ground on the belly. Inhale into Bhujangasana (Cobra Pose). Exhale to release and then inhale into Salambhasana (Locust Pose). Exhale to release and flow through these two poses a few more times. Take time between each movement and then release back Balasana (Child’s Pose) to focus on the breath and the energy in the heart chakra. Come back to Cat-Cow movement and then come to standing on knees. Close the sequence with a long, slow flow into Ustrasana (Camel) pose. Take up to six full inhalations and exhalations before letting go and slowly find a seat with eyes closed. Absorb the energy created and released around the heart center. Acknowledge any emotions that may have come up and know that which no longer serves no longer has a hold on the heart center.

“Learn, grow, live… And then write about it!” Alicia started her path to wellness and environmental leadership at Wild Oats, following college graduation with a degree in journalism. Her passion for natural living, environment, and wellness set the foundation for a future with Aveda where she is currently a marketing manager and manages the yoga program for staff and students. She is a certified yoga instructor and received her training through Core Power. Her favorite pose is handstand, though she is still working on mastering it. Her writing is a continuous practice, much like yoga, and began when she published her first book at age 12 called, “What Mothers and Fathers Do Best.” She is a proud mother of a 6-year-old boy, Tyler, the source for her inspiration to live in the moment-be mindful-be gracious and flow. Tyler is currently publishing one book a week, his latest being the “ABC of Animals.”

Read Alicia’s other article, “Getting Back to the Yoga Mat“.

Guidelines to finding your flow, again

By Alicia Parks

Yoga is everywhere these days. It has arrived and is moving beyond its Paparazzi-like intrigue into an accepted part of our western society. Yoga has transcended time, culture and spirituality. It offers numerous benefits including creating flexibility and strength, decreasing stress, healthy weight management, increasing immunity, and connecting mind and body. Knowing yoga offers all these results, why have so many of us not tried yoga? More so, why have many of us drifted away from our mat?

It’s been said many times by almost every instructor from whom I’ve taken a class (and I have uttered the words myself), “the hardest part of your yoga practice is getting to your mat.”

The key word here being “practice.” Yoga is a practice. As an instructor, I have new arrivals in my class each week and I find myself constantly reminding the newcomers to remember that yoga is a journey. There will never be perfection, there is always growth. And this is a hard concept for many of us to grasp. Yoga does require an investment of time and energy. It requires work and dedication. This is a lot to ask of ourselves in an already demanding world.

In health and fitness the leading edge is faster results with least effort. We’ve even decreased the 8-minutes abs infomercial to 6-minutes abs or less. It’s a wonder how many obscure expectations have been brought to the mat by newcomers. Having expectation is setting up one for disappointment.

Because yoga is a practice, the first class is not a fair representation of all the benefits yoga has to offer. These gifts are received over time. Many may not come back to the mat because expectations were not met. As a newcomer to yoga there’s a lot to be accomplished in one class. As a regular yoga practitioner there is still much to accomplish as well. Yoga creates a flow and connection between the mind and body, between balance and proper posture, between alignment and breath and between Dhristi (focus) and meditation. (This is also known as the 8-Limbs of Yoga by Patanjali).*

My first time on my mat, I was lost—a half-step behind the cadence of the class and I did not stop looking around the room with deep concern about what everyone else was doing and how I looked. I didn’t know child’s pose (Balasana) from Warrior II (Virabradasan II). My mind was racing to understand Sanskrit and the English translation all the while getting into the pose (asana) finding balance and then trying to remember to breathe.

At the end of class I rolled up my mat, dazed and confused, but not discouraged. There was a residual feeling that I haven’t experienced after an aerobics class or running on the treadmill or lifting weights.

Intrigued by this feeling, I returned to my mat again. And again. And again. Each time I gained a better understanding of the postures, breath and flow. Over time my mind and body began to connect and communicate. I worried less and less about how I looked, what others were doing, and didn’t have to think so hard about what posture is what and where I was going next. I began to find my flow – my reasons for returning to my mat again and again.

And then I realized that never in my history of break ups and new relationships with my fitness regime have I ever completed an exercise with a final resting pose – a few mere moments to collect my breath, my energy and bring my mind and body together. In yoga this is called Savasana – the final pose in which one can absorb the benefits of his practice. I have yet to see anyone at a gym relax into Savasana after 30 minutes of cardio exercise. (In Savasana one is lying face up, eyes closed, legs and arms spread out).

I believe Savasana to be a powerful force in generating inspiration deep within our minds and bodies to get to our mats. The bliss I experienced in my “ah-ha” moment (of why I come to yoga) didn’t happen in my first class or overnight. It took weeks of practicing. It was a journey and still is. My reason for getting to my mat is my own and it was a discovery in time.

Reasons why we don’t get to our mat are endless and become easy ways to persuade our egos: too tired, too much to do, I’ll go tomorrow, I’m not flexible, I don’t know how, or I didn’t like my first yoga class. It’s easy to come up with reasons not to go to yoga but there are a few simple guidelines that may help squash those excuses.

Bannish Your Excuses With These Simple Guidelines:

1. Keep an open mind and remove expectation. Don’t anticipate the same feeling after your first class to be like that of a first great date. Try first to just focus on moving the body, getting your foundation. Then over time you’ll hone-in on flow, breath and meditation.

2. Give it more than one class. It will take time to learn the postures and flow. Be kind to yourself and allow a learning curve. Try to take a class at least once or twice a week. If you space out one class a month, the growth will happen but at a much slower, more difficult pace.

3. Try not to think too much. The mat is a great place to let go of the constant chatter in the mind.

4. Remember to breathe.

5. Yoga is not a religion. It’s simply a connection to the self. You control your own thoughts and beliefs. Some instructors may offer suggestions, thoughts, quotes or even a mantra but you have the power to choose to be open to it or not.

6. Accept that this is a practice, not perfection. The ego is running the show most of the time during this first class because it’s “protecting” you from failure. This also creates an illusion of your experience because it wasn’t your true expression (and thus another layer has been removed – that of the ego – a topic to consider later in one’s yoga journey).

7. Do not establish routine. I’m still finding my flow and because I understand and have accepted that yoga is a practice to connect my mind and body (yoga in Sanskrit means union with the self) and come to mat each day knowing that my practice will be completely different each time. This intrigues me to know that even if the sequence is the same, what I bring to my mat is different.

8. Journal after class – get deep and just write what freely comes to mind after class, or stay on the surface and just jot down a few comments about how you feel after class. After a few sessions, read through your journal and maybe you’ll find your own “ah-ha” moment for why you will return to your mat.

More important than guidelines is the simple fact that in yoga, one can “own” his own practice. You create the rules, the focus and can gain what you want from class and then hopefully carry that practice off the mat and into the world. When the excuses start to surface again, the true power of yoga is when the reasons not to get on the mat lose the fight against the infinite reasons to get back on the mat.

*Yoga On and Off the Mat

The 8 Limbs of Yoga by Patanjali

Patanjali, author of the Yoga Sutras, and creator of the 8-Limbed Path has deeply influenced and helped shaped the continued growth of yoga. His influence dates back over 2,000 years when he led a school of his own. His teachings still echo in yoga studies today.

The 8-Limbs of yoga are the disciplines one studies while practicing on the mat (and off). They are inward and outward observances of the self, an explanation of what is really going on deep in our mind, bodies and souls while we flow. It’s the breath, the posture, the flow, the balance, the moving meditation.

The first limb is the Yamas, outward moral restraints. Second is the Niyamas, inward moral restraints. Each of these breaks down into sub-catagories:

Yamas consist of Ahimsa (non-violence), Satya (truth), Asteya (non-stealing), Brachmacharya (moderation), Aparigraha (non-hoarding).

Niyamas include Santosha (contentment), Tapas (discipline), Isvara-Pranidhana (devotion), Saucha (purity), and Svadhyaya (self-study).

Following the Yamas and Niyamas is Asana (posture), Pranayama (breath), Pratyahara (turning inward), Dharana (concentration), Dhyana (meditation), and Samadhi (union with self).

When moving through a sequence many of the 8-Limbs are obvious: the asana is the pose, the breath is the energy that moves the body, the concentration to move from one posture to the next, the meditation or union with self when the mind is calm and quiet. What is not as obvious are the Yamas and Niyamas. This is really where we take our practice off the mat and into our personal lives, into our relationships, into our work places. Yoga then becomes a practice of being truthful, being content, practicing moderation, and so on.

When I was going through teacher training, one of my yoga instructors had us do a homework assignment involving the Yamas and Niyama. Each day we would pick a Yama or Niyama to focus on for that day. We began by meditating for a few minutes with the particular word in mind (for example, I chose Satya -Truth. I would inhale Satya and then exhale Truth). At the end of each day we would journal for a few minutes. The key was to observe and become more mindful of how focusing on the word could affect our lives-without making drastic changes, like quitting our jobs. Just observe. Try this on your own as well. See what comes up and become a witness of your life. Then reflect on the journal entries to find connections, similarities or opportunities.

“Learn, grow, live… And then write about it!” Alicia started her path to wellness and environmental leadership at Wild Oats, following college graduation with a degree in journalism. Her passion for natural living, environment, and wellness set the foundation for a future with Aveda where she is currently a marketing manager and manages the yoga program for staff and students. She is a certified yoga instructor and received her training through Core Power. Her favorite pose is handstand, though she is still working on mastering it. Her writing is a continuous practice, much like yoga, and began when she published her first book at age 12 called, “What Mothers and Fathers Do Best.” She is a proud mother of a 6-year-old boy, Tyler, the source for her inspiration to live in the moment-be mindful-be gracious and flow. Tyler is currently publishing one book a week, his latest being the “ABC of Animals.”